Dollie... a friendship rekindled

Remember the blue feather last year?  Gracie wouldn't let it go for hours, holding it on the bus ride all the way home from school, through taking off her clothes, putting them back on and even in the car on the way to therapy.  Up until that day, she had never held onto a toy (or any object) in the car like that.  And she didn't do it again until September 17th.

It all started on September 16th.  Well, in reality, it all started years ago. Gracie got her Dollie when she was just a baby.  They were pals for a long time, as much as Gracie can be pals with a toy.  See, as loving and doting of a doll mom as Gracie can be (Dollie, Edna, a couple of babies...), she can go equally cold and distant and leave the her dolls behind, ditching them and even refusing to look at them!  Remember the kidnapping last year?!  (While this is meant to be funny and lighthearted, the truth is that there have been many days over the years where a particular toy - - no rhyme or reason in our minds - - will trigger a crazy rage with Gracie and she won't calm down until that toy is out of her sight line.  Dollie has, many times over the years, elicited that very reaction from her.)  Gracie hadn't played with Dollie in ages.  Other dolls and babies, yes, just not Dollie. 

Back to September 16th... I took this of the three kids together following Gavin's 7 month "green chair" pictures.

Immediately after, Gracie signed, "doll."  (It just so happens that this is the same as our sign for Dollie since she was Gracie's very first doll.)  She signed again, much more forcefully, which made me feel as though she weren't just signing "doll," but, instead, asking for her old friend.  I said aloud what I thought she was wanting and Preston ran off to get Dollie from the playroom.  In the meantime, I put away the camera (doesn't it figure?) and, as a result, I took this picture with my cell phone when Gracie happily took Dollie from Preston with look of sheer satisfaction.

She got exactly what (who) she wanted and she was content.  For hours.  Days actually.  Dollie was attached to her like a limb... she went everywhere for an entire day.  And, if Gracie hadn't started school on the 18th, I think it would have lasted even longer!

Once Dollie was in her arms, she remained there all night.  She scooted all around the house with her, doing laps around the kitchen island and in and out of the playroom area.  Gracie took Dollie to bed with her - - a first. She began playing with her the moment she woke up in the wee hours of the night. And, as the sun rose, she continued playing with her. When she and Girlie (her brand-new-at-the-time nurse), left for a walk, she continued holding onto her! (It was only then, nearly 18 hours after her initial request, that I busted out the camera and started documenting!)

Before the walk

After the walk (she her disheveled hair?!)

Closely watching Gavin to be sure he wasn't planning on snagging her friend from her grip!

This just makes me smile!
 

She held Dollie while Daddy suctioned her trach...

... and while he pretended to suction Dollie's.

And, without dropping her for a second, she managed to get her shoes, socks, shirt and shorts off all while scooting off the cube chair!

She carried her to the car and transferred her from one hand to the other while I got her belted into her car seat.

And she held onto her when I put her shirt back on and seated her in the double stroller to watch Preston's soccer practice.

Later that night, she brought her to bed...

And, she fell asleep by her side!
(Yes... Gracie is asleep!  Yes, her eyes are open.  No, she can't close them all the way!)

And this is her at 3:43am, happily playing with her old friend.
(Her first day of school was only a handful of hours away!)

Later that morning, she held her as John carried her to the bathroom for a bath!

And, two days later, she held her tight as she got ready for school!

Had she not started school, I think Gracie would have continued hanging out with Dollie. They have, over the last few weeks, bonded several more times, but nothing as intense as their nearly 48 hour reunion! It just proves the point that, no matter how long between visits with old, true friends, it's easy to pick up right where you left off!

Gavin (Month 8)

Standing Man!!!
The monthly "green chair" pics are incredibly challenging now!  Your preference is to be "in motion" at all times.  So, indulging mommy and sitting for a few pictures is not on your agenda!

Not still... even for a second!  LOL!

LOVE this... love your face!
Blurry shots like this are pretty standard... you are a boy on the move and I don't have the time to focus properly!

Dear Gav-man,

You are a BUSY boy!  I don't even know how to keep up!  You are super serious... yet so playful.  We were at the park the other day and the grandmother of one of Preston's classmates commented on how serious you were, taking everything in.  She said, "That boy is going to grow up and change the world... he is already thinking about it!"  I thought that was a spectacular thing to have said about you!  But, for every serious, "taking it in" moment you have, you also get silly, laugh at our "jokes" and make your own.  You crack up at Preston the most and Daddy comes in a close second.

You pull up to a stand and try to climb everything!

 

If there is one thing that is certain these days... you are CRAZY busy.  Your Papa says you're like a raccoon... into everything.  It's SO true!  You cannot be trusted anywhere with anything for more than two seconds!  And, you think (just like Preston did) that sleep is overrated!  You take a good nap... sometimes.  Most of the time, without actually putting you in the car, you take two 30-45 minute naps a day.  One in the mid-morning and one in the late afternoon.  The rest of the time is go-go-go!!! Even your previously solid night sleep has been disrupted during this month. I am hopeful that, with the surge in your gross motor skills, perhaps you'll start sleeping better again. 

Little Mr. Busy!  These were taken at the end of September.  You changed so much from the beginning of your 8th month to the end.  It's mind boggling.

You desperately want to go outside and play catch with Toby.  Soon enough, Boo-Dee, soon enough!

"Oh... am I not supposed to climb onto this?!"

"Here I come, Mama!!!"

Here you are during our "green chair" photo shoot on October 16th.  Instead of photographing you in the chair, it's in the background! Over the course of the month, you went from not pulling to stand, to standing up everywhere and falling down (causing me a nervous breakdown and giving you multiple bonks, bumps and little bruises for about a week), to figuring out how to get down from a stand without falling. It was a big month for you!

You are much better in the car than a few months ago, but when you do fuss, the best remedy is when Preston sings to you.  It doesn't matter what, just that he sings. So, most of the time, he sings his sight-word songs (songs he learned in kinder to memorize the spelling of words!) and you are instantly quiet.  Your response to Preston is amazing.  You actually have a "mute" button!  LOL!

You love mealtime.  Though you want to do everything yourself and that's challenging (to find foods you can feed yourself that don't come from a jar and are not puffs!) and to keep us all from wearing it!

You've had many firsts... lots of big days lately!

September 25th was your first "big boy" shopping trip to Costco.  You were MESMERIZED from your new vantage point! You've always just been in your car seat or stroller (or in the cart while in your car seat).  Once you got over the initial awe, you were squealing and squeaking your way through the store. In fact, I could find you and Daddy in the aisles from your little voice!

September 27th... first "teething biscuits."  You growled almost the entire time... sort of like a dog with a rawhide bone... just happily grunting as you gnawed away!  Then, the next day, you scared the daylights out of me and choked a bit on a too-big chunk.  You have not had those again.  I don't like the idea that you can bite off a huge piece at any given moment.  I'm sure you'd be fine, but I don't care.  There are plenty of other things for you to grub on!

On Friday, September 28th, you gave me my first unsolicited slobbery, grab-my-face baby kiss.   You were so sweet. Mouth open, tongue all gooey! LOL!  You grabbed my cheeks and smmmmmmoooooch! I am so in LOVE!!!

On October 2nd, I found you, after your brief afternoon nap, awake in your crib... STANDING!!!

I love you HUGE... and all your faces!  :-)

Happy eight months, sweet boy!  You are a ton of fun and bring our family so much joy! While time is moving so fast and I want you to slow down, I am excited to see what fun is in store for your ninth month.
Love, Mommy

The Gracie Update

It’s time for some serious catch-up on all things Miss Gracie. To set the record straight, it has not been my intent to exclude her from updates here. In fact, I have so many partially started posts sitting in blogger, that it’s shameful! The problem is, Gracie’s updates require a great deal of explanation and, well, truth be told, gathering my thoughts and getting them put to paper (or screen) has been very difficult the last several months. The move (so much surrounding that should be its own post!) and taking care of three kids (two of whom rely on me completely for everything) have made the more thought-full blog posts take a back seat. I’ve just been too overwhelmed with the day-to-day - - we are busy living!  

All dressed... and finally somewhere to go!
Gracie was super excited on her first day of school! (I was a nervous wreck!)

I’ll start with the best news… Gracie finally started school on Tuesday, September 18^th… after over five months total out of the classroom.   We weren't sure what she could handle after so long out of school (but for a couple of visits to her new class while we waited to find nursing).  In true Gracie fashion, she was gang-busters for her first day and when I stopped by the class just before picking Preston up (they are on the same campus!!!), they told me she was fine to stay the last full hour.  She was signing, responding to questions and involved in the day.  I walked out of the room with tears in my eyes.  Happy tears.  Relieved tears.

My quick snapshot of Gracie Girl before we wheeled her into class.
 I didn't want to make a big fuss, but still tried to capture her... It's not the best picture, but the moment was big and I wouldn't be me if I didn't try to capture it!

Before she could start school here, we had to establish private nursing at home  (and that nurse would attend school with her).  Accomplishing that task proved to be (just as I figured it would) quite difficult.  We don't exactly live in the most convenient community as far as commuting goes.  (That being said, we are finding that, even though this is a small community east of Mt. Diablo that was comprised mostly of orchards and farmland only two decades ago, it is proving to be very "special needs" friendly in many ways.)  Because of our location, we met only four nurses over the course of two months… one of whom basically admitted liking dogs more than kids (and was 30 minutes late and sans bra … and that wasn’t a good thing!) and another who, though super nice, would likely be relocating in six months.  Then we met Girlie, Gracie’s new nurse.  She worked a full week before we had Gracie start school and has now been with us a month.  Girlie has taken a definite interest in learning to sign the basics with Gracie and Gracie seems to like her.  (Because of the timing of our "modified year-round" schedule, Gracie has only had 8 days in the classroom - - the first two weeks of October are the fall break. I look forward to Gracie getting back into the real groove of school this coming Monday.  And, if I am being totally honest, I am just plain looking forward to both of the big kids going back to school!) 

I haven’t met Gracie's entire school team, but obviously know her teacher and aide… both of whom I adore.  Everyone within the district and county has made a huge effort to get Gracie into the classroom as fast as possible and has gone the extra mile to make her transition happy and seamless.  Thus far, the communication with me has been fantastic and the classroom has an open door policy, so I can drop in whenever to check out how things are going.  So far, so good.

As many of you know from communication outside the blog, we pulled Gracie out of school in April.  The details will not be posted here… at least not for now.  Suffice it to say, we take her education and school experience seriously and pulling her out of her program was not a hasty decision, but the circumstances surrounding (what turned out to be) her last day required quick action on our part.  As we searched for new placement and subsequently found what looked to be a great school, we learned that John was to be transferred back to Northern California.  It seemed unfair to start Gracie in a new program in late May, have her attend for a few weeks of the regular school year and only two weeks of the extended school year before moving her 369 miles to start all over again.  More than any of us, Gracie was facing so much change in such a short time.   Her world had been full of goodbyes… some explained prior to them happening (like losing her long-time Occupational Therapist when she moved away in January) and some just happened.  Even though we felt she was better off not returning to her school placement, she lost her familiar routine and the people in it, including all of her peers.  With the move, she lost the familiarity of our friends, our neighborhood, our home, her wonderful nurse (tireless advocate, friend, park pal, playmate), Pearl, her great therapy family and her doctors (some of whom we adored).  Everything turned on a dime for Gracie and, unlike the move in late 2008, she didn’t handle it all that well.



Gracie cruising on her favorite trike during her last day of Physical Therapy before the move.
Behind her is the wonderful Director of that therapy unit, Kristen, and her beloved, dedicated PT, Laural.
We both miss our old therapy family so much!

 

Miss G working the stairs with Pearl and the top motivating her with toys and Laural helping her press on.

 

With Kelsey, her sweet as pie Occupational Therapist

With Laural... whom we not only loved as Gracie's PT, but also as a friend

The goodbyes were so hard for me - - not just because of my own feelings about leaving - - but because as Gracie’s mom, I knew that her world was in the process of literally tilting on its axis and I had no guaranteed way of helping her fully understand it or protect her from what she would feel as a result.  Our decision to move was family based… not Gracie-based.  That is, while we naturally must consider all of Gracie’s specific and particular needs first, we must consider the fact that we are a family unit and decisions like a big, life altering move must consider Gracie, but not only Gracie.  There were a lot of tears shed on my part… for all of us.  But the biggest ones have come since the move, wondering when and how things would start to settle for her… and inside those tears was (is) a lot of guilt for disrupting her world so much.

Pearl and Gracie heading out on one of their park outings.
We miss her tons!

For over two months, she was depressed.  Her feedings, though always challenging, became more of a struggle.  Her behaviors became more challenging.  She was unmotivated to do much of anything. Granted, in the first days at the new house, she was eager to check things out, but for the most part, she just hung out, unmotivated to play or walk much.  And, because it was extremely hot most days, she didn’t even get the chance to be outside much except for first thing in the morning - - a huge change from living just a few miles from the beach.   With the exception of our immediate family, every bit of her routine and the people in it, was taken away.  She even lost therapy time because she was wait-listed for the first two and a half months after we relocated.  Between July 13^th and September 18^th, her good days could be counted on one hand. 

Thankfully, there was good in there and... we took pictures! 



Life of leisure in the pool!
The first weekend after we moved, we drove halfway back to our old house to spend the day with family.
To say that Gracie thoroughly enjoyed their new pool would be an understatement! I think if Gracie understood the concept of a wish, she'd wish for this in her own backyard!

Hanging with Daddy... one of Gracie's favorite things.

Another good thing... John is off on Sundays.  This hasn't been the case in nearly four years!
On one of John's first Sundays off, we took a long family walk, stopping for lunch and park time.  Gracie spontaneously signed "happy" and "family" while we were lunching.  That, I can assure you, made up for a lot of really rough days for me.  Gracie's simple expression refueled me on so many levels.
 

Hanging with Gavin... Gracie seems to enjoy him as much as she did Preston at that age.
I think she remembers a lot from that time, too.  She chuckles at him regularly, even from across the room and has, on more than one occasion, signed "cry" when he's fussing. 

Hanging with two of her most favorite people in the world!

I love this!  I was loading up the car and signed to Gracie, who was in a different room than Gavin, that it was time to go.  I came back inside after taking my first load of stuff to the car to find that she had not only crossed the house, but had brought him his chewy ring, and was sitting up like this in his car seat to give it to him! 

So, it hasn't been all bad... just not an overabundance of good.  The important thing is we appear to have passed that really tough space and, with the exception of getting "medically re-established" (9 specialists, a pediatrician, a dentist and several therapists...), we are on the other side of a lot of hard stuff. 

(A little "good" teaser... Remember the blue feather from last November?  There was a "blue feather" day recently - - actually, it was more than a day - - stay tuned for that cuteness!)

Gavin (Month 7)

Once again, your pictures from your monthly green chair photo shoot leave me unable to make a decision!
Your sweet, happy face and priceless expressions fill each image and I love each one for different reasons.
 

You look so big here... Mr. Long Legs!
You are definitely not built like Daddy and Preston - - both of whom have long torsoes and shorter legs. 
YOU have some long legs, buddy!
 

Be still my heart.  I LOVE this! 
Your innocent-but-not-so-innocent expression makes me smile ear to ear!
 

Dear Gavin,

You are seven months old and busier than ever!  I can't turn my back for more than a few seconds and, I fear, in just a few days, that will change to "I can't turn my back."  You are scooting everywhere in an army crawl fashion and are fast as can be!  In fact, just in the last few days, I have been shocked at how fast you'll cross the house to get after something I tried to redirect you from just a moment before.  You grab onto anything you think might help you pull yourself up and you're army crawling over most things that get in your way (pillows, my legs, toys, Gracie!). You're pushing up onto all fours, but haven't yet started to crawl. It will just be a matter of days before you get up and take off.  When that happens, life, as I know it (and you view it) will never be the same!

In the last month, you...

- Had your first haircut on your 7 month birthday.   (Notice that your former faux-hawk-turned-comb-over is gone in those green chair pics?!)

Let's face it, the "Trump-do" had to go. Now, all of your "original" hair is gone and only the super blonde "new" hair is left. You look adorable! (Okay... so I might be biased!)

Nope!  Not biased!  You and your new 'do are adorable!  Seriously.

- Enjoyed a whole host of new foods.  Though you're only having a small "snack" of solids and a good-sized dinner in the evening, you love your food!

- Discovered that gnawing on a frozen washcloth is quite wonderful for your gums and even seem to prefer it to most of the teething toys we have.

In addition to showing your intent gnawing on the washcloth, here is a decent shot of that comb-over just a few minutes before we chopped it off! 

- Discovered grass.  You are obsessed with touching it, pulling at it and, of course, trying to eat it.  It, however, is not nice to you and makes you very red and itchy, just like your brother.  Like Gracie, you are also fascinated by flowers.  When I say, "Smell the flower, Gavin," you lean in and stick out your tongue!  It's so cute!  I will miss it when you figure out how to sniff!

- Started consistently waving "hi" and sometimes "bye-bye."
On September 2nd, when we decided it was official, Preston cheered and clapped for you and then asked me, "Are you going to freak out and cry?!"  It was downright hilarious!

- Mastered sitting up on your own.  Though, sitting is not moving, and, therefore, you don't stay that way long!



You are often busy "racing" your brother to various toys!  He cracks up as he plays with you, often in disbelief at how fast you've gotten and how much you can do even though you're so much smaller than he is!  He thoroughly enjoys playing with you and watching the two of you interact brings me endless joy (and elicits endless squeaks and squeals from you!)

You... at 6.5 months, surprising me by getting all the way from the play room to the laundry room in the time I walked into your bedroom to put something away. 

- Experimented more and more with your voice.  You squeal and squeak with delight.   Even Daddy calls you "Squeak" now (in addition to Boo-Dee).  Your squeaks have made a serious comeback and have all kinds of different tones depending on what you are doing.  You babble a ton, too.  And, with many sounds, seem to be trying really hard to imitate what you hear.   You also watch intently when we sign to you and Gracie.
(I have some great video footage of you, but, for some reason, I can't get videos to upload!)

 

You are so much fun and so incredibly busy!  Though I remember many things about Preston at this age, I forgot how entirely exhausting it can be to keep up with a mobile baby and still try to get things done during the day!   By the time you and your siblings are tucked into bed at night, I am ready to collapse!  I look so forward to seeing what levels of exhaustion you can cause me to reach as you grow and change in the next month! 

I love you, Squeaky Boo!
Mommy