See Ya 2010

Yes, I am still the same girl who believes in the power of yet.
Yes, I am still the same girl who believes that change and resolution can (and should) be made any hour of any day, not just at the new year.
And, tonight, I am the girl who is so incredibly glad to bid farewell to 2010.
In case you haven't been following along, 2010 was not a good year for the Flock.

Yes, we made some great memories.
Yes, there were many wonderful moments.
And, yet, I'd be stretching the truth to its very seams if I were to say that the majority of those memories and moments weren't made around awful circumstances.
We made the most of what was going on at the time - - that is what we do. We celebrated the little things because they were happening, regardless of the other ten not-so-little and not-so-good things that were also happening.

Gracie's health was poor all year - - she began the year battling endless infections and life-threatening feeding issues that literally left her emaciated, weak and desperate for nutrition. She was septic four times, twice in septic shock, had major abdominal surgery, and continues to battle those relentless infections. And somehow, because that's what she does, she rallied through it all and just keeps rallying.
(She even ended 2010 with a nearly five day stretch of an abdominal migraine that lifted just enough this evening to allow her to spend about an hour and a half with friends at a New Year's dinner party.)
Throughout the year, John and I made difficult personal decisions, financial decisions and family decisions. And, needless to say, we made excruciating decisions regarding Gracie's health, her care, her life - - we did way too much thinking, we were all tested way too much - - physically, emotionally, spiritually. I am so relieved that this is the end of 2010 and that tomorrow we will be looking at a new family calendar on our refrigerator... changing it will give me great pleasure and, what I hope is, closure to this period in our lives.

In true Swann family fashion/function, John and I divided and conquered tonight. While Preston and I stayed late with dear friends to have fun and celebrate the New Year, John took Gracie home early (he has to be up at 4:30am for work). Just moments ago, before the clock struck midnight and before I started this post, I kissed both of my sleeping children and my husband and whispered to each of them "Happy New Year... See ya 2010."